Bigwordsofwesterntour（大話西游）.doc

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其他范文/相聲小品劇本 Bigwordsofwesterntour（大話西游） 　　big words of western tour （大話西游） 　　chapter 1 　　site：the wedding 　　characters:牛魔王 、至尊寶、紫霞、小妖 　　aside: the story begins with a wedding. the bull king is going to have a concubine. 　　牛：today is my wedding. i am going to have a concubine. ha ha ha ……. 　　妖：concubine? dose your wife agree to it? 　　牛：oh! she is not lovely anymore. she’s right now at the flame mountain. she can do nothing about it! 　　(至尊寶從后臺走入人群中) 　　牛：let me introduce my brother to you! my bro! 　　come here! this is my brother. 　　(牛深情地轉(zhuǎn)向紫霞) 　　牛：zixia, listen to me. i think i ‘ve fallen in love with you once i know you. i want to show my sincerity. so i request you to marry me in front of my bros. this pandora’s box is my gift to you. i hope you would say yes. 　　妖：i object! 　　牛：what? 　　妖：zixia has a means to test her lover. if you can pass it, i will shout up! 　　至：what’s this? really? 　　妖：this test is that she would marry the guy who can make her magic sword go out of the scabbard. 　　(劍從至的懷中落下) 　　妖：magic sword? 　　牛：let me do this! 　　(紫跑出，拾劍) 　　紫：it’s not true! it’s just a joke. it is still meaningless even if you can put it out! 　　(紫跑下) 　　妖：king, iron fan princess has come. 　　牛：aaa…… 　　(牛驚慌地跑下) 　　aside: the monkey king leaves the front hall, running to back garden…… 　　chapter 2 　　site: bull king’s back garden 　　characters: 至尊寶、紫霞 　　（至跑過來，突然看到紫獨自坐在臺階上，于是走過來） 　　至：why are you hiding here? 　　(紫抽劍，指向至。兩人定格，至走出來，獨白) 　　至：at this time, the blade is really close to me, 0.01 cm i think. but after a short period of time, 0.01 second i think, the owner of the sword will fall for me whole-heartedly. because i’ve decided to tell lies, i’ve told many lies in my life, but i think it is the most wonderful lie! 　　紫：i’ll kill you if you come closer! 　　至：you should kill me! kill me! i’d found my best love, but i didn’t treasure her. i left regretful after that. it’s the ultimate pain in the world. just cut my throat, please don’t hesitate! if god can give me a chance, i will tell her there words. “i love you”. if god wants to give a time limit, i’ll say this love will last 10 thousand years! 　　（紫長嘆，拋劍，拾劍，抱劍） 　　紫：what can you tell your wife? 　　至：i have to tell her the truth. so i must get the pandora’s box back. then go back with you and explain everything. but i hate myself that i can’t get the box back. i …… 　　紫：i help you! 　　至：no, it’s dangerous! 　　紫：you don’t want to? 　　至：i do! but …… 　　紫：i trust you! i’ll get the pandora’s box back tonight. wait for me here at midnight. 　　(豬喊) 　　至：let me do something to my boss first. see you tonight. 　?。ㄒ酪啦簧幔? 　　aside: the night …… 　　chapter 3 　　site: dungeon 　　characters: 至尊寶、豬八戒、沙僧、唐僧 　　豬和沙：master, master 　　(兩人同時悄聲說) 　　豬：we come to save you. 　　沙：we come to bring you out. 　　唐：i won’t go. 　　豬和沙：stay here? why? 　　唐：there’re full of obstacles in the way of getting scriptures. this is because we’re not united enough. so we let the devils do bad to us. that’s fine. this prison has no difference with the outside world, to me; the outside world is just a bigger prison. you go out first. i have something to tell him. 　　(豬和沙下) 　　唐：you come in and have a sit! 　　至：to be honest, i’m not your disciple. i don’t want to be your disciple. master i know you’re a good guy. please let me go! 　　唐：do you know “dong , dong, dong ……”? 　　至：what is “dong, dong, dong”? 　　唐：“dong, dong, dong ……” is …… 　　(唐唱only you) 　　至：stop. stop. i can’t take this anymore, please stop …… 　　唐：ohoh …… 　　至：damn you, you … i’ve said i can’t take this anymore. don’t disturb or i’ll kill you. 　　唐： monkey king, you can kill me. life and death are very minor. when you know why you should make sacrifices, you will come back and sing this song with me. namonitabhaya … 　　(至跑走) 　　aside: the monkey king succeeds in escaping form the bull king, and he reaches the spiders’ cave with the grapes. unfortunately, the monkey king and his friends meet the queen of spider. 　　the monkey have heard that if the blade slashed fast and accurately, the guy who’s cut open won’t die at once. he can still see. so he asks the queen of the spider to kill him as fast as she could and to tear his heart out and let him have a look. 　　after the monkey king’s death, he appears in the hole of waterfall … 　　chapter 4 　　site: the hole of waterfall 　　characters: 至尊寶、觀音 　　至：goddess. i’m about to understand your words. i used my eyes to see in the past. what i was dying. i started using my heart to see this world. then i could see all things clearly. that girl …h(huán)as left a drop of tear in my heart. i felt her sorrow. 　　觀：have you given up all things in human world? 　　至：yes! life and death is just minor! …… but i don’t understand why can human’s hatred last 10 years, 50 years, and even 500 years. what hatred is it? 　　觀：so that tang monk went to the west and got scriptures, which clean out hearts. 　　至：ok, i want to stay here, there are many things waiting for me to do. 　　觀：i want to warn you again. after wearing the gold ring, you’re no longer a normal human. you can’t have human desires anymore. if you do so, the gold ring will get smaller and smaller. it’s very uncomfortable. 　　至：ok. 　　觀：before wearing the ring, what do you want to say? 　　至：i had had found my best love, but i didn’t treasure her. when i lost her, i regret. it’s the most pain in the world. if god can give me another chance, i will say there words to her “i love you”! if there is a time limit, i hope, it is 10 thousand years!